Luie Journal
In our Luie journal you get to meet parents from the everyday life. Parents that inspire us!
Sanne Alexandra
32 years old
Influencer
Stockholm
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Sanne Alexandra is an influencer, runs her own clothing brand and will also soon be able to call herself a holistic health coach. She shares about her tough start into motherhood and the importance of taking care of yourself to become a better parent – “Your oxygen mask first!”
Who is Sanne? Tell us about yourself!
– I’m a curious, happy and spiritual 32-year-old with a passion for wellbeing. I’m a mother to Frans and Selma, married to my Jacob and I run the clothing brand Sanne Alexandra Stockholm.
How’s life as a mother and influencer?
– Never lonely! When I was pregnant the first time we lived in Buffalo and didn’t have a very social life. But my followers were always with me. I love my channel and the energy it gives me, which is what made me continue working during both my maternal leaves. Life would’ve been so much more boring during my maternity leaves without my channel.
Tell us about your thoughts on holistic parenthood!
– I think, just like everything else in life, that everything is an entirety. How we sleep, think, move around, eat, our social life, our relationships – Everything affects us. In today’s society it’s easy to drown in all methods and do’s and don’ts that comes with parenting.Unlike the first time with Frans, I think the same time with Selma has been very different. I felt like I had finally found myself again and what makes ME feel good. I let go of all the methods, the musts, and everything suddenly became so easy.
– When I first became a mother in 2018 we lived in the middle of the city with stress and high energy, and I had a hard time saying no. I didn’t work efficiently and became stressed if our home was messy when we were expecting guests. I had walked right into that classic trap where I wanted to be able to manage everything perfectly. I was a “people pleaser” who didn’t think highly of myself, and I didn’t manage my sleep, food or exercise the way I should. The second time I had really figured out what gives me energy and excluded things that only stole my energy. Suddenly I was the old Sanne again. Technically I should be more tired now with more work and two children instead of one. But after I learned to be careful with my recovery, prioritizing what’s really important and shutting out other people’s opinions, life became so much easier, with and without children.
Your best lifehack as a parent?
– Make sure to plan for recovery and take care of yourself first. It’s like they say on the airplane – put on your own oxygen mask first!
What would you have liked to say to yourself when you became a mother for the first time?
– Keep doing what feels right in your gut and don’t work away from what feels natural. Dare to normalize that your baby falls asleep on your chest and stay home instead of going to that dinner you don’t want to go to. Do what feels right for you and ignore all methods and inventions that don’t suit you. Let go of your performance anxiety and remember what “a good mother” means to you.
How do you remember your time as a new mother?
– I remember the first eight months mostly just as cozy. From eight months it was pure and simple exhaustion! Eight months followed where I forgot everything called taking care of myself. When having a baby, you need to take more time to recover, something I didn’t do.
What was it like to go from one to two children?
– Like magic! To go from zero to one child was a huge difference but actually not to go from one to two. I respect that this is different for everyone, however, for us I just felt like we became a family in a whole new way. We often take one child each!
If you have ever worn a sling – tell us about your experience!
– I’m a big believer in closeness and to carry your child is something we’ve always done. The sling is amazing for a little relief in the arm so you can get other things done as well. Selma was born when Frans was 2,5 years old and I used the sling a lot with her so I could simultaneously play with Frans, cook and bathe him. A child carrier sling is a true lifehack.
She is a nurse, doula and hypnobirthing-instructor. Opokua Britton helps to support women during different stages of their pregnancy. We got the opportunity to ask her a few questions about her work as a doula. Opokua also provides us with her best tips for pregnant and new parents!
Who is Opokua? Tell us about yourself!
– Good question! Now that I’m pregnant it feels like I’m evolving into a new version of myself, which feels very cool. Right now I’m a research nurse, a mother, bonus mom, doula, hypnobirthing-instructor and podcaster (Systrarna Britton).
We know you work as a doula, both traditionally during births but also during abortions. Can you tell us more about that?
– I’m what you call a “full-spectrum doula”. I work mostly with births at the maternity ward, but also during planned c-sections, abortions, before births, support during IVF, etc. During all of these different events, and especially during an abortion, you can be in need of continuous support and I can be the one to provide that. The arrangement can be different every time and is decided from different factors but the foundation is always support, support and more support.
How does one go about to contact you if they want to hire you?
– You either DM me on Instagram where you find can find me at @curlydoula or through the contact form on my website curlydoula.com. Right now I’m on maternity leave from my role as a doula. For how long? I’m not sure, I’ll decide that after my own birth.
Your best tip to prepare before giving birth?
– 1. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and support. 2. Fill up your freezer and cupboard with good food.
Your lifehack as a parent?
– Daily meditation. It makes me a better human and a better parent.
What do you wanna say to pregnant and new parents?
– You already know what to do. Don’t be afraid to listen to your own instincts. What does your child and inner self say? Disconnect the outside world so you can hear yourself better.
If you’ve carried your child in a sling before – please share your thoughts about that!
– I carried my firstborn in a sling but I never really got the hang of it. She liked to be in the stroller and it was extremely cold during her first months so I never really tried it full out. This time I will have another child already and will therefore have a greater need to have my hands free, so I look forward to getting a sling of good quality and in a good material (unlike last time).
Tove Hammerin is, together with her partner Benjamin, running the ever so magical (and pink) Hobykulle Herrgård. A beautiful bed & breakfast with a castle feel in the south of Sweden. We got the opportunity to ask her what it’s like running a bed & breakfast with a newborn and how everything with Hobykulle Herrgård started. – Well, I’m the mother of my daughter Lova. Her father Benjamin and I are together running our bed & breakfast, Hobykulle Herrgård, in the south of Sweden. I lived in Barcelona for many years before I met Benjamin, and when we met, my life completely changed. It was like everything fell into place. – I met Benjamin in July. Everything just felt so right. In August, I got to meet his parents, and in September, we bought Hobykulle Herrgård. First, we did a little bit of renovation in the house, and then we started hosting guests. It’s been a crazy and beautiful ride. This summer, we were fully booked for the whole summer. I’m a living example that everything can be just as good as you wish. – At first, I had a hard time leaving my “first baby”. It’s me and Benjamin who have built everything that is Hobykulle Herrgård today. I’ve painted all the rooms, cleaned the whole house, baked the bread that we served to our guests and so on. But when Lova came into our lives, what was important to me before, completely changed. Being self-employed and a mother is a way of life. Our job is our life because we also live in it. At least once a day, I feel like a super mom. It’s just about getting the puzzle of life together. But I think this life is absolutely perfect. – This might sound a little naive but just do it. If we would’ve thought too much about the pros and cons, we might not have done all this. Now we got this chance, and we would’ve regretted it if we hadn’t done it. Dare. Dream big. Benjamin usually says that we have gone into this with 200%. Do that as well. Now we’re in our third year running this place. We just worked so hard during these years. But we have done it for ourselves. What I simply want to say is – don’t be afraid to dream. And, don’t think too much. – It’s been the best thing that has ever happened to me. Now I’ve started to understand what everyone’s been talking about. I’ve always dreamt of becoming a mother. And now I am one. It’s absolutely amazing. I’ve changed for the better. But of course, it’s been hard too. Hard to find me in this new role in life. But I think I’m starting to feel like myself now (two months in). We’re starting to find our way. My and my daughter’s bond is so strong. We have found each other. When you become a mother, something happens. The small things that were important before all of a sudden don’t mean that much. Now I try to do one thing and not stress on to the next. I accept that I, some days, want (and need) to sleep and drink eight cups of coffee. – Don’t listen too much to what others have to say. Follow your gut feeling. What I chose to do was to read and learn. You get an idea of what you want and believe, the same thing for when the baby has arrived. Often the expectations don’t cope with reality at all. And that’s okay. Take your time. There’re so many birth videos and pictures when people leave the hospital with their newborn children. For us, nothing was like what we’d seen in photos and videos. If you can, you should probably try not to have any expectations. Accept. No demands. It will never be as you think, but it will be good anyway.Tove Hammerin
Entrepreneur
Hobykulle
Who is Tove?
Tell us more!
What is it like to combine running a popular bed & breakfast with a newborn?
What do you want to say to others who long to do like you and follow their dreams?
If you want to share – What’s it been like to become a mother?
What do you want to say to expecting mothers who go through the waiting times?
Ebba
28 years
Birth photographer and doula
Stockholm
Have you ever wondered what it’s like witnessing a woman giving birth? Ebba Barkenbom knows all about it. She is both a doula and a birth photographer. We got to ask her a few questions about her life and what it’s like being in the birth room.
What does a day look like in your household?
– Right now, a day looks like we all three have breakfast together. Then we go to preschool and work. I have just recently started working after 2.5 years at home, which was a time I loved, but now we have a new everyday life with a little more routines. It feels better than expected. I long until the afternoons and the pick-up from preschool, and to have quality time together at home in the evenings, while I think that the days at work are fun and rewarding! In the evenings we usually either meet some friends or stay at home and cook and play. It is both my and Oscar’s favourite moment to sit and listen to Ingrid’s little thoughts around the kitchen table in the evenings.
You are a birth photographer and doula. Why did you become one and, what is the best thing about it?
– I started photographing births after giving birth myself. I then discovered what an incredible and powerful experience it is to give birth to a child. I also felt that it was the biggest achievement of my life in every way. And I thought: if this is what you get to experience in the room when a child is born, all the emotions, all the big things that happen, it has to be captured. A birth is private and intimate. And I think it should be. But it is also one of the biggest things in life. And it’s worth highlighting how amazing all women are, both those who give birth but also the midwives for the work they do.
– I decided to become a Doula after photographing many births and always felt that I wanted to do more once I was in the room. I have seen couples and women give birth who may have wanted and needed more support and help. A hand to hold. Security and encouragement. A little more preparation and better conditions, which I believe and know today, make such a big difference when giving birth.
What is it like to be involved in such intimate situations?
– It’s a privilege. It is always such a special moment. You get to be a part of something so big. Time stands still when a child is born and, the happiness, relief, love and joy that arises when the baby comes is unbeatable. It can not be explained and can hardly be photographed, but I try my best.
Do you have a moment that is the absolute coolest thing you have experienced in the delivery room? (Except maybe when you gave birth yourself).
– Except when I gave birth and got Ingrid on my chest, which was the biggest moment of my life, it’s hard to say a specific event. I can think back on every single birth and get warm in the heart of all the memories and everything I have been able to experience. What is so incredibly cool to see and follow every time is how the woman fights, the emotions go up and down, the couple goes through so many emotions together and finally often after a long time of fighting, tears and pain, then finally comes the moment when the baby comes out. A relief, joy and calm appear in the room. You can almost touch that feeling because it is so strong.
Do you have something you want to say to women who are going to give birth?
– Prepare yourself the way you can by reading books, taking a prophylaxis course, listening to podcasts with people who have the knowledge and experience of having children. Trust yourself and your body, but also do what you can to give yourself the best conditions. I believe that knowledge gives security and a sense of control. When giving birth to a child, you need love and protection and, you may need help to maintain the peace and security that we want to give birth in. Having a doula with you when giving birth is a great help for both the woman and the partner. A doula’s task is to help the mother to have a positive birth experience by constantly feeling seen, safe, respected and listened to. And I do not think you can get too much of it during childbirth. So that’s my tip!
What do you want to say to new mothers and fathers?
– Do what you think is the best for your child and trust yourself. I wish I had been more secure from the beginning with making my own choices and not listening to much at what society says. The norm is not always what’s best for everyone. The best you can give your child is your love, time and security.
Having children can be challenging – do you have a life hack to share with other parents?
– The life hack that I try to challenge myself with every day is to, as often as I can, let go of what I’m doing and stop. Whether it’s from cooking, hurrying to preschool, answering a text message on the phone, fixing the counter or whatever it is that I “have to” do. Instead, sit down with Ingrid in my arms, meet her where she is, hug her and say I love her, ask her how she is, listen to something fun that happened during the day and take a few minutes in the middle of it all and pause, and take care of the most important thing I have, my child. It is the little things that matter the most.
Lovisa Rosell
31 years
Doula and birth/yoga teacher
Stockholm
A voice for women
Lovisa Rosell is the woman behind @doulaverket on Instagram. She is a rising voice on the Instagram scene and a professional doula. On her Instagram, she shares her thoughts about everything pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. We got the opportunity to ask her a few questions for our Luie Journal. Enjoy!
Tell us about yourself!
– I was born in a small town in Sweden. After high school, I moved to Stockholm, where I studied at Stockholm dance institute. After that, I became a dance therapist and then finally a doula, which I work as now. I’ve always been interested in how the body and our feelings are connected. In that way, I can see a connection between dancing and giving birth. They both are so much about wordless communication. I am 31 years old. I live in Stockholm with my boyfriend and our two kids Isak, four and Luna, two. I work as a doula and hold courses within giving birth and pregnancy yoga.
Why did you become a doula?
– I’ve been interested in pregnancy and giving birth since I was a little girl. I’ve always known that it is something I want to do. I took a little detour and studied dance, but in my final exam, I studied different physical processes in the body and managed to persuade an internship at the maternity hospital. There I was reminded of the intuition I had as a child – to work with everything around giving birth. A few months later I started studying to become a doula.
What is the best thing about being a doula?
– The best thing about being a doula is to be able to meet so many different people and to be able to follow and support them through their pregnancies. It’s not about me as a doula, but about their experience. I’m there when they need me. Sometimes it is enough that I am just in the room, and confirm and encourage what is already, and sometimes I am very hands-on and more concrete in my support, depending on the situation. It’s the women who show me the way. Every birth, I learn something. I strengthen what already exists. The woman who gives birth has the power within her. The people around her are there to remind her of just that.
Tell us about your Instagram platform!
– My head was full of thoughts and reflections that needed to come out somewhere, so I started this account to write both about my experiences as a doula but also about the experience of becoming a mother myself. On my Instagram, you can read about motherhood, breastfeeding, pregnancy and childbirth. I hope to empower women to make choices based on who they are. There is no right way to give birth or be a mother, we are different, and there need to be different alternatives.
Having children can be challenging – do you have a life hack to share with parents?
– Yes, it can be challenging. I grope my way out just like many others. Sometimes I have the strength and feel like a present mother and sometimes I have no patience at all. But my starting point is that children are capable, children want to feel needed and inclusive in the community. I try to let my children be involved as much as possible and they love to help with various daily chores. Small tasks adapted to their ability. Children grow out of trust. So my advice would be to give your children time, trust and love – then the rest will come by itself.
What do you want to say to new moms and dads?
– As parents, we get so much advice from the outside. How to be and do as a parent, what a child needs, etc. Eventually, we risk to lose ourselves and what we believe in. No one knows your child like you. Trust your intuition. Choose what advice you want to listen to. Try to see your child exactly as it is, without your wishes and ideas about what life with children would be like.
What do you think is the best thing about babywearing?
– As a new first-time mother, it was my salvation. I had a child who just wanted to be close. I was stuck on the couch until one day I had to borrow a sling. Since then, I have continued to carry both my children a lot. I think it’s smooth. It gives a feeling of freedom when you are away. It’s easy to breastfeed in when you are on the go. Plus the sling was where my kids wanted to sleep. Using slings has also been the easiest way for their dad to comfort and make the children fall asleep.
What does a perfect Sunday look like at your home?
– I am from a big family, I have six siblings, so I love when the house is full! A perfect Sunday would involve a big brunch with friends and kids that continues all day long.
Just outside of a medium-sized city in the middle of Sweden lives Johanna. A teacher, wife and mom who we got to ask a few questions about her lifestyle in general.
Johanna and her husband Per have two kids, Nanna and Knut. They live in an architectural house that they built themselves. On their spare time, they usually spend time in the woods or work on their garden which they are not very fond of, but hey, some things has to be done right?
Tell us about yourself, Johanna!
– I am 31 years old, and I’ve just started to work as a teacher again after being on parental leave for quite a long time. We had two kids very close to each other (only one year apart). I am currently working only 60% so I can have a lot of time home with the kids. I am married to my husband Per since four years back. Per works in Stockholm, but since covid-19 he is working a lot from home so now we are at home the whole family most of the time.
What does a regular day look like at your home?
– If we are both working, the kids are at pre-school until I pick them up in the afternoon. When we get home, most of the days a marathon of playing around in the house starts. Then we cook food, eat together, bath the kids, brush their teeth and then it’s time to sleep. On the days where I’m free, we are taking it easy in the morning with a slow breakfast. Then we play a bit inside the house before heading to the playground or the woods. If I am lucky, the kids want to take a nap at the same time before the afternoon-play-marathon-dinner-bath-night-routine starts again.
Tell us about your house!
– We live in an architectural house that we built our selves. The house is located a bit outside of town, close to the lake and the woods. We love living in our home and spend a lot of time there. We don’t have so many things interior-wise (except for a lot of toys). We like to keep it clean it gives us a sense of calm.
How would you describe your personal style?
– My style is quite simple. I usually dress in a white shirt and black pants. I am working on having a wardrobe that can last over time and where most of the clothes go well with each other. When I’m home, I wear something comfortable like tights and a cosy shirt. I’ve never understood people who wear jeans at home, haha.
Having kids can be challenging – do you have any life hack to share?
– My worst moments as a parent is when the clock starts to approach 5 pm, and it’s time to cook dinner. Two hungry, tired children are not easy to maintain! Here I think of two options – either letting them watch TV or let the children cook with me. When the conscience says no to TV, all that remains is to let them be involved in the cooking then one child gets a chair, a piece of cucumber and a plastic knife while the other child goes up in the ring sling. That trick works all the time.
Tell us about your experience with wearing your children in a ring sling!
– The best thing about the ring sling is to be able to get the children up quickly and easily. I have two children who like to cling to me like little monkeys, especially my little one has a need to be carried around. Then the sling is a perfect way to get some relief and I can use my arms a little better than when I carry him normally. In addition, it is fantastically cosy! Even my big 2.5-year-old wants to be carried in the sling sometimes, and it’s like we get closer to each other than when I carry her normally in some way, like when she was smaller.
Best Sunday activities?
– Whatever the kids feel like doing. Whenever they are satisfied, I’m happy. But if I’d say one thing it would probably be to go out in the woods and stay there the whole day!
